things i've learned from dad

:: "don't kiss any boys; don't smoke any pot"
:: when answering the phone either say "speak to me" or "this is me; is that you?"
:: ice cream is best eaten out of mugs
:: if you run a can of tomato paste under hot water for a minute or so, and then poke a hole in one end of it, when you open the can and pour it out, it will all come out at once
:: classic rock is the best music in the entire world
{and}
:: van halen is always a bad idea
:: chocolate malts and french fries go incredibly well together
:: if you can get people to laugh, they'll remember what you say {i.e. go outside and sear your retinas, comparing the brother of Jared seeing Christ to Jack Nicholson chopping through the door and shouting "Heeeeeere's Johnny!" in The Shining, etc.}
:: upon entering a room, shout, "What's going on in here?"
:: if you say you're going to do something, you'd better follow through with it
:: chips and salsa are the greatest snack
:: knowing how to drive a stick shift is more important that knowing how to drive an automatic

and there is so much more
Happy Father's Day!